Sunday, June 12, 2011

I am now a mum to a young woman, Happy Birthday Malinda Rose.

Today I become a mum to a young woman, no longer a "little girl" my daughter Malinda Rose has turned 12. I sit and ponder how on earth did that happen? How did my little cherubic baby girl with the big brown eyes and mass of black hair turn into the exotic looking beauty that she has transformed into over the past 12 years. Not a girl but a young woman. Gone is the chubby dimpled hands and round baby face and in their place stands a tall, slender, beautiful young woman.

Previously I have (like many of my blogger Friends) liked to share about our children's birth and early baby/toddlerhood as the time to celebrate their birth approaches however I have decided that I wont go into to much detail in this post about Malinda's conception, birth and early childhood for a few reasons, one of them being that it was a difficult time for me, a child myself the cliche pregnant teen, dumped by the child's father, it was a time of pain and very quick road to maturity. The other is I want to honor my daughter and believe that I should sit and share these memories and the path I journeyed on with her another time, as she grows from a young woman and matures into the amazing adult I know she will become I think there are things that will need to be said just between her and I.

However I DO want to recognise and celebrate her birth with a blog post! What an unexpected treasure she was to me, at 19 terrified about being a first time mother (a single one at that) we learnt together, my girl and I, from her first tooth to her first period we continue to learn together. Malinda has taught me so very much, In our early weeks and months together she taught me patience, perseverance and how to love with every part of my heart and soul. Her hurts were and are my hurts, we grew together, Malinda from a baby to a toddler, me from a girl to a women stepping into the role I had been called into, that of a mum.

Malinda is an absolute superstar of a person. Funny, strong, outgoing and very determined, at 5 and a half she was struggling in her class at school and development. Testing, lots of doctor appointments and outside help would reveal a learning disability, auditory processing delay and speech and developmental issues... as her stepfather and I would sit together devastated she would soldier on, I watched my determined girl push through, hours, months and years of speech therapy, occupational therapy and changing of schools from a mainstream public school to a school where she would receive the specialised help she needed. She worked hard, stubborn and would not be held back by her learning issues she has continued to grow and achieve, she gives her best and pours her huge heart into all she does. She has blessed and enriched my life beyond anything I could of imagined.

12 years together, mother and daughter, we sometimes switch between the roles of teacher and student,but that's okay we experience the new together with love and for the most part mutual respect. Don't get me wrong it's not all sunshine and roses the pre-teen attitude is a challege as is the moods and hormonal swings all women deal with but as her mum it's my job and pleasure to guide her through these as gently and with as little eye rolling as possible.

Pimples, boy friends and peer groups have replaced teething, nappy's and teddy bears, how did this happen? When did this happen? I know it sounds so cliche but really time it seems to have passed in the blink of an eye... first bra's, heartbreak, crushes on Justin Beieber and that boy from school, it's all happening so fast. I remember bringing her home from hospital, holding her tiny body thinking how perfect she was.. nothing has changed in 12 years, I still gaze at her amazed and think you are wonderful my daughter, my first born beauty, you're perfect.

Malinda, today 12 years ago at 1:20pm is the day that my life changed in a million ways and every one of them for the better, because you were born. You have grown into an amazing young woman, I admire and love you so very much. Your laugh is infectious, your courage inspiring, your determination amazing, your heart beautiful, your smile dazzling, your compassion admirable. Happy Birthday my darling.

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Am I a man or a mouse?

This blogger has been in need of some time out,and my in laws who are house sitting in New South Wales offered myself and the kids some time away with them in the country. Eager for a break in routine and two extra pairs of hands to help with the tot's I jumped at the chance to head off for a week. A few days before I set off on our country adventure I caught the end of a current affairs shows which to my horror was a segment on the terrible mouse plague happening at the moment in country N.S.W.... EEEeekkkkkk!!! I watched in terror and nausea as I saw farmers separating bales of hay to have 100's of mice scurry out. I watched whimpering as what appeared to be thousands of mice ran across fields,roads and farm houses.

Mice are more than an annoyance and plagues can cause significant damage to our agricultural sector. Mice also cause considerable damage to farm infrastructure—including sheds and machinery and unprotected fodder and stored grain, mice can also cause considerable damage to my holiday! I HATE MICE!!! They are horrible little furry things that freak me out with their quick scurry and filthy little poo pellets. I quickly decided that I was NOT going to be going on the wonderful country adventure after all. Hubby however manage to convince me that I would be fine he assured me that the mice plague was not actually near where the kids and I would be staying so there was no need for me to stress..... he was WRONG!!!!

OH MY GOSH! On the drive into Junee (country N.S.W) I counted 21 mice scurrying across the road in about 6 minutes slowly I began to freak out! Turning to David I say "I don't think I can do this", again came his naive "you'll be fine babe".
I ran from the car to the house greeted by my beautiful in laws I began babbling about the mice I had seen and how worried I was... my father in law... who now holds the title of THE GREAT MICE WARRIOR of New South Wales, proudly boasted to me how in 8 weeks he had trapped and killed 500 mice,(yes he does keep a record of his carnage and yes it creeps me out) my heart sank right down towards me knees and I felt bile rise up into my throat. Oh crap, how am I going to cope with these pests for 8 days.

I have however managed to cope rather well,... yes.... me! I have been astounded at myself and my ability to not totally loose my shit when I see them running about the farm. The Great Mice Warrior has 6 traps baited with peanut butter and a small dog biscuit set up to lure and trap these pests before they get a chance to invade the house... a thing I am very grateful for. I have been receiving quite an education on the destruction and devastation mice can actually cause and I have a new appreciation for our framers who are already doing it so tough with the weather conditions who also have to deal with these pests on such a massive scale. Having to re-sew crop after crop as the mice nibble away at the freshly sewn seed it comes at a huge cost to the farmer. Interestingly while here I visited a local church and the minister gave a sermon with several mouse related analogies... this did NOT impress me, however it also bought home the huge affect these pests are having.

I have also learnt some creative (and gross) ways to catch mice outside the home, The Great Mouse Warrior has an interesting contraption/ torture device rigged up for any mice venturing into the garage with a plank of wood,a drinking can smeared with peanut butter and a bucket of water... you get the picture??? Also learnt they are attracted to dog biscuits... yes dog biscuits which The mouse warrior,(also known as Norm) adds to the peanut butter in the traps, to help give them weight and set the trap off as a mice nibbles at the biscuit, also dish washing liquid helps to add to the drowning of the mouse... yes it does sound barbaric and at first I was truly horrified but today as my Mum in law and I drove through the country and I saw fields of crops in various stages of sewing, re sewing and growth I have come to realise it is a necessary part of farming life at the moment if our farmers are to make any kind of head way in dealing with them before more of their lively hood is ruined.

Now while I have grown in my strength to be able to stomach the thought of a mouse on the veranda you will not find me emptying traps or disposing of a mouse corpse, however I will admit to a small feeling of satisfaction as I hear the loud SNAP of the plastic trap going off enclosing a mouse within and grin as I watch Norm react with satisfaction as he say's "I got another one"!!

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Submission in marriage.. it's actually what I choose.

Often the question of submission comes up in my circle of friends. As a christian women in a Christan marriage, I submit,(sometimes with a grumble) to my husbands authority as head of our house, knowing that he has been charged with the responsibility of taking care of our family's needs emotional, practical and financial, a huge responsibility and one that he takes very seriously.

Submission is a word which can be described/defined as “willing conciliation.” That means that the wife should be “willing,” not coerced. Wives respect their husbands. Husbands are to be considerate of their wives. BOTH partners should be willing to “put the other’s interests above his/her own” as Philippians 2 describes. The woman should be willing to submit to her husband not be unwilling and NEVER forced. The man should be a loving, servant leader – accountable and responsible to God and his family. A loving leader leads – doesn't manipulate or pressure. I am grateful and blessed to be part of a loving covenant marriage, I am proud to submit to my husband, it doesn't make me weak or stupid, but instead gives me the confidence to know I can express myself how I choose and know I will always be valued and respected by the most amazing man, my husband.

I know that people who don't follow this biblical Principal can have a misunderstood perception of what submission really is and why we as women do it. The bible Say's "wives submit to your husband" Ephesians 5:22... now I know many people who misuse this verse and only focus on the first part about wives submitting to their husbands, but the verse continues and says "and husbands love you wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her" Ephesians 5:25. This I see is a huge honour and also a huge responsibility, I mean Christ loved the church passionately, Christ died for the church, he gave his EVERYTHING for the church, and knowing that my husband has been called as a Christian man to love me the same way blows my mind. Knowing and being completely secure that my husband loves me passionately that he would give his everything for me, that he would die for me, means so much more to me than not having the final say over buying a new piece of furniture or DVD...

A good friend of mine describes submitting to her husband as "equal partners with different roles in the marriage". I love this definition, I think some people have the impression that submitting to your husband means you give away your brain.. your right to say no or have an opinion in your own life. I can categorically say this is not true, I still have (and always have had) very strong opinions and I am free to express them and know I am heard when I do so, sometimes my husband may agree with them sometimes he may disagree, but ALWAYS I am heard, loved and above all respected! These again are the things I value most for my man, rather then having an argument over a new purchase or dinner out I understand that my husband has his reasons for saying no to certain things and that he does it because he has a responsibility to look after our family unit as a whole and may see the bigger picture for us, one that I might not see at the time,... My husband ( a beautiful man) expresses his opinions or disagreements with me in a respectful tone and manner which lets me know that he loves me and has heard my voice and values my opinion and input.

I see my husband loving me as Christ loves the church everyday, I see it as he gives up time with his friends to ensure that I get to spend time with my friends having nights out at craft group or going to dinner, I see it as he goes to work an puts in a full day working hard to financially provide for us, and then comes home to a house full of people and doesn't complain because he knows it make me happy to entertain, I see it as he works through out family budget and always makes sure that there is some extra cash on hand so I can do an unplanned shop at spotlight or take my bestie to a movie. I see him sacrifice over and over for me and our children and I am astounded at how much he gives of himself to me and I know that submitting to him is so worth it as I am loved and cherished as Christ loved and cherished his church, passionately completely with his everything.

Blog Template by
Sponsored by Free Web Space