Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Real men do ballet.....rant of an angry mummy

So usually I am a calm blogger who thinks through carefully about what I am going to say/write because I like to express myself in a certain way but right now I am SO FRIGGING ANGRY I just have to blog and get this out of my system before my head explodes with annoyance and with the feelings of total gender injustice!!!

So as most of you know my gorgeous son Peter who is 5 has started ballet lessons, in fact he had his first lesson yesterday and if I do say so myself looked incredibly sweet in his dance pants and ballet shoes I was so proud of him. He has been asking/begging for dance lessons periodically for about 6 months and at first I resisted thinking he would grow out of it to quickly changing his mind the way he changes his undies and if I am being honest I would say I also resisted because I was afraid of what people would say about him having the lessons, but the more he asked for them the more I began to see that ballet was something he was very passionate about and when my eldest brother Adam (who is very much a mans man football player soccor coach etc etc) said to me "if he wants to dance let him dance who the hell cares as long as his happy, I will come and watch him dance" I felt it a turning point in my attitude he was right the most important thing was that Peter was/is happy and if dancing makes him happy so be it. We looked around and with the input of Aunty Lanii (the dance queen) have found a local place that is really good with a great reputation. Peter was incredibly excited about his lesson yesterday and for a boy who can be a bit shy when trying new things he took to it with ease and had a ball. I am so happy that HE is happy...

Well I was happy until I told my mother about his lessons and that we had gone ahead with them for him she laughed and in a somewhat sarcastic tone informed me that it was "no surprise" that Peter would be dancing, then I got told that "he isn't really a sporty person and he will probably change his mind anyway, maybe he will do tennis since he will never play football" OH MY GOD!!!!! I was SO angry!!!!

And maybe it seems like I am airing "family dirty laundry" but ya know what this is my blog and I am annoyed and I gotta say what I feel. YES Peter is a sensitive and feminine boy YES he cries easily and NO he doesn't like football or rough play He would prefer to do craft then kick a ball or wrestle this doesn't make him any less of a boy, for frig sake we are talking about a 5 year old here I really don't think that ballet dancing is going to "turn" him gay, if he is gay he is gay dancing won't make or change that and that is something we will have to work through and process with him when he is older but for now how about we just let the little guy be happy and frigging DANCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If he is teased at school by other boys or bully's he will have the confidence and conviction to stand up for himself knowing that it is HIS choice to dance and that he is allowed to be who he is and he has the right to do what makes him happy (as long as he isn't hurting anyone or himself) and not be some created image of what society thinks a man is supposed to be, here's a heads up men can cry and still be men, men can dance and still be men and men can treat woman with kindness and respect and still be men. I am raising little men not sheep!!! I am proud of my boy and his choice and am happy he is off the couch getting some healthy exercise and most importantly he is having FUN doing what makes him happy and as a parent how can I want anything less for him..Thus end the rant!!!!

7 comments:

  1. Much as i love your mum, PFFFTTT to her!!!! So what if in six mths he decides to do something different ( not that i think he will!) You are doing what makes him happy, thats whats important. He is a happy, healthy, friendly, funny, loving, caring and passionate child! And i wouldn't say he is feminine as such, I would just say he is a child!

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  2. Reminds me of Billy Madison hehe
    Male ballerinas have to have more finely tuned physiques, fitness, coordination etc than footballers... and often they are hotter too! Peter will prob have an advantage over all the other boys on a football field (or any other sports venue) because his coordination, fitness etc will be so more developed than the other kids... we're thinking of letting Josh have lessons for couple of years purely because it does give him an opportunity to learn to control his body and coordination etc!!

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  3. As long as he is happy, let him be! At least he is giving something HE wants to do a go, it's wrong, girls can freely play football and not be questioned, but boys doing ballet/ dancing, somehow people see it wrong? FUCK THEM!!!
    You are doing the best thing for him, and that is letting him have a go at a sport he likes and chooses to do himself, not something he is pushed into, he is lucky to have such an encouraging mother like you!!!
    Can't wait to hear of any performances he will be in :-)

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  4. and ps - I don't see how any kid who is such a ladies man like Peter could be considered gay lol. And last I checked Molly was a girl... why would a gay guy have a crush and plan to marry a girl?!

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  5. Lees, I LOVED reading on facebook that your SON was doing ballet!!! It's awesome ;)
    And guess what, my bro was never into footy or cricket, and I'm pretty sure I remember him doing gymnastics with me(in my verrrry brief gymnastics stint!), and guess what? He's married to a female and has children!!
    Peter is a gorgeous little fella and you are a lovely nurturing muma to let him pursue his individual interests xxxx
    Oh, and Uncle Adam has his head screwed on pretty good to, good for him and his attitude!! ;)

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  6. thats part of my point Bethany!!! I want Peter to be a bit more aware of his space and co-ordination as well, unfortuntaly he is a tad clumsy like his mumma so I know that ballet can only help. Yep he is a ladies man alright but fear not he is very faithful to Miss Molly his wife you know!!!!

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  7. As a boy who was enrolled in tap at age 5, put in a matching leotard and tights same as the girls, changed to ballet at age 7 and all with the help and blessing of my mom became a professional ballet dancer at age 18 I thank you for having a long term view. Your son will benefit immensly from your support.

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